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May. 30th, 2018
(no subject)
May. 30th, 2018 09:13 amMore depression whining, in case you want to skip it. In short, I'm sorry I haven't been very interactive with people. It's not you.
I'm not managing depression well right now. I'm stuck in that difficult space I've been alluding too. Feeling hypocritical, in conflict with my own sense of self. The regular weekend dungeon visits with Danae haven't been happening (particularly ironic given how very long I've wanted that kind of thing in my life). I haven't been trying to plan a first meeting with a Facebook friend who's indicated that she' like to meet in person and see if we'd be compatible for dating or as play partners. (To be fair, she's pretty busy and has her own mental/physical health issues too.) I've been ignoring Posi's suggestion to come help him build a firepit. There's a game convention coming up in Milwaukee this weekend that I have Friday off for and a hotel booked for, but I'm not really excited about being there. All things that I'd normally really like to do but I don't want to. I don't want to leave the house if I don't have to; I just want to stay home. When I'm at home, I'm not working with my electronics or reading books. At least I'm snuggling my partner while we play video games together; That's pretty enjoyable.
I did see this come through Facebook today, which is a good reminder that it is not too late for me to do the sort of crazy thing I keep imagining myself doing.
I'm not managing depression well right now. I'm stuck in that difficult space I've been alluding too. Feeling hypocritical, in conflict with my own sense of self. The regular weekend dungeon visits with Danae haven't been happening (particularly ironic given how very long I've wanted that kind of thing in my life). I haven't been trying to plan a first meeting with a Facebook friend who's indicated that she' like to meet in person and see if we'd be compatible for dating or as play partners. (To be fair, she's pretty busy and has her own mental/physical health issues too.) I've been ignoring Posi's suggestion to come help him build a firepit. There's a game convention coming up in Milwaukee this weekend that I have Friday off for and a hotel booked for, but I'm not really excited about being there. All things that I'd normally really like to do but I don't want to. I don't want to leave the house if I don't have to; I just want to stay home. When I'm at home, I'm not working with my electronics or reading books. At least I'm snuggling my partner while we play video games together; That's pretty enjoyable.
I did see this come through Facebook today, which is a good reminder that it is not too late for me to do the sort of crazy thing I keep imagining myself doing.
(no subject)
May. 30th, 2018 09:33 amI was talking with a doctor here who often comes by to chat with us at the library. We were talking about chemistry and I mentioned my great-grandfather, who was a researcher for Portland cement. As well as bunches of articles, he wrote this, which I have a copy of with his hand-written corrections.
https://www.amazon.com/Durability-Concrete-Construction-Institute-Monograph/dp/B000PU65LI
I never knew him, but I wish I did. I'm told he was a scientist, a ham radio operator, and that he ground his own telescope lenses. My mother says he would have been absolutely fascinated with computers.
https://www.amazon.com/Durability-Concrete-Construction-Institute-Monograph/dp/B000PU65LI
I never knew him, but I wish I did. I'm told he was a scientist, a ham radio operator, and that he ground his own telescope lenses. My mother says he would have been absolutely fascinated with computers.