Updates from Danae

A couple updates from today that I am shamelessly copying and pasting from Danae's Facebook page.

"So Chris and I managed to dayshift and got up at a semi-reasonable hour. We captured our kitty and put him in the carrier and went to Pet Valu, where we fitted him for a collar. It looks really pretty on him, and when he becomes less skittish, I hope we can get a picture to show you all how handsome and adorable he is. (ETA: Cute as it looks, we bought it so that we could attach a little capsule that contains our contact information in case he ever gets out again.)

We drove by Jysk, which is kind of like a cross between IKEA and Bed, Bath, and Beyond, and it looked low-traffic, so after returning the kitty to my parent's house, we went back out in the car. This time we experimented with running a USB-powered humidifier and AC at the same time. See, thing is, it's about 32 Celsius/90 F here, and the humidity is really high. So high, that I am actually pretty functional in terms of coughing and talking etc., if I am outside. But, I don't sweat much, so I don't cool down properly, so I overheat really easily. So it's all about trying to strike a balance between these things.

Anyway, we grabbed some tasty burritos and then ate them at some outdoor tables, and then put our masks back on and ventured into Jysk to try mattresses, couches, and feel linens to see if they were too rough. We were helped by a very nice fabulous gentleman who I assumed was gay by his mannerisms and rainbow glasses frames. We're going to try to get a canopy bed so my Princess (Chris) can have a Princess bed like she's always wanted. 🙂

By the time we got home I was pretty wiped out, so I lay down for a nap. Then my parents and I drove into Toronto to have dinner with my brother and his partner. Dave ordered takeout in advance and reserved the rooftop terrace in his new building, so we had a nice safe way to see each other for the first time in years. The temperature was dropping and with it, the humidity. That made it way more comfortable in some ways, but it meant that when I wasn't eating I had to suck on lozenges and take breaks from talking. 🙁

Chris took advantage of having the house to herself to go wild. By "Go wild", what I actually mean is, she played loud music, sang, and started packing the roof bag we bought for the car to give us a little more cargo space. Since getting home I have played a little Genshin, managed not to throw up from a coughing fit after too long in an air conditioned car, attempted to look up the specs on my father's computer so that Dave can buy him a car racing game, and run the wash. It should be done now, so I will move it to the dryer and then get into bed. A busy day, in comparison to what we've been doing the last few weeks!

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In other news, Chris and I both had our own episodes of slapstick this evening. Upon arriving at my brother's apartment, my mother graciously told me to go ahead and use the bathroom first. All was going as normal, until a jet of water began fountaining out of the toilet bowl and onto the floor. I shrieked and/or swore loudly in dismay; I think I may also have told the water that I didn't want it to do that. Whatever I did say, it alarmed my family, and they started to inquire as to my well-being.

As they did so, my mind worked frantically. What could explain this phenomenon? I concluded that the toilet must somehow also be a bidet, and looked about for the controls. I found them, and flustered, chose a button-- any button-- in the hopes that it would stem the tide of water spraying onto the floor. It did stop fountaining out of the toilet bowl, so I thought I had turned it off, but alas, I was in error. I called out to my family, embarrassed, that I was fine, finished my business, and exited. But when my mother tried to enter, it was still leaking water on the floor. So my brother had to turn it off , mop up the water, and give my mother a tutorial on how to use the bidet before she could finally use the facilities.

Meanwhile, Chris was at home, packing clothes into vacuum bags. One of them came with a hand controlled vacuum pump. And, like you do, she was messing around with it. A lot. So I get home and there is a crescent shaped hickey smack in the middle of her forehead, of which she was totally unaware. "What happened?" I asked, concerned. Chris was puzzled, but once she figured out what had happened, we both had a good giggle over it.

Guns and Countries I've Lived In

One thing I loved about living in the Netherlands is that it is next to impossible to legally own a gun. World Population Review data for 2021 indicates gun ownership per 100 people in the USA is 120.5. In the Netherlands, it is 2.6. Per person, there are over 46 times more privately owned guns in the USA. That knowledge made me feel safer, and I would love for the US to to adopt policies that make gun ownership similarly difficult.

Thinking about vast paradigm shifts like this bring to mind a thought about capitalism from Ursula LeGuin. “We live in capitalism. Its power seems inescapable. So did the divine right of kings. Any human power can be resisted and changed by human beings."

But I don't know how to get there from here. In the US, gun control measures disproportionately affect groups that are already disenfranchised and which are in greater danger of violence from socially dominant groups who are less likely to be affected by such measures. A big part of of this is that power structures in the US are fundamentally racist and biased against other minority groups as well, so implementation of any policy will be colored by that racism and bias. Attempting to restrict gun ownership is going to harm this minority groups disproportionately.

It seems insurmountable. But so does capitalism, as did the divine right of kings. This change is not impossible. But I don't know how to contribute to it, and it's certainly not going to change soon. The current state of the US is another reason that I, as a queer trans person, feel safer in Canada than in the US. (There are many other reasons like attitudes about Covid, but that's another matter.)

Even in Canada, whose territory covers vast swaths of wilderness full of dangerous wildlife, there are only 34.7 privately owned guns per 100 people. The US is a giant statistical outlier on this, and I can't believe that this is simply the way it has to be.

I also believe that people must work within the system that they occupy. Whether that's the divine right of your liege, or the inescapable necessity of buying things, or the need to defend one's self in a dangerous environment. The environment *doesn't* have to be dangerous in this way. But for a lot of people right now, it is.

I miss people in the USA a lot, but there are many reasons I'm glad not to be there.