(no subject)

I dreamed about being at a party at someone's house or apartment, and the isolation is hurting a lot today.

I keep thinking about writing on the local trans Discord that I'm looking for people to go walking with, or to visit dog parks or go biking with. But every time I look there, people are talking about doing things I can't do and it hurts too much to want to be in that conversation. Before my dad died, I had just that very week been in the online trans support group meeting after a long absence. I felt like maybe my brain was together enough to enjoy seeing and talking to people without feeling crushed by not being able to do most of the things they do. But after my dad, I don't again.

There's so much I'm trying to deal with on top of that, too. I have a 15 minute consultation/intake with a therapist on the 14th, thanks to Miriam helping me with that process. I wasn't really up to it on my own.

(no subject)

I went to both of my favorite little spots near here today.

I like that concrete bowstring arch bridge across Wascana Creek on Fleet Street. I told it so while I was visiting.

On the top of the western arch is painted "If you see this ->" And I'm left wondering what? If you see this then what? I guess I may never know. I want to walk Longing up there on top of an arch and take a photo from deck level but not without a rope or something as a safety measure to secure it in case it in case of wind! Though maybe I can get someone to come with me and take a picture of me up there some day.

https://www.strava.com/activities/9597230522